The news about Nex Benedict reached my children. This was not unexpected, as we are consumers of news and often discuss current events as a family. This conversation was hard. Harder than usual. One of their peers was brutalized. This could happen to them or one of their friends, and they feel it.
As a parent or caregiver, it is our responsibility to talk with our kids about their fears and reinforce the safety and security measures in place to protect them. Many resources suggest that you should tell children they are safe without qualification. This doesn’t feel genuine to me, especially since one of my kids experienced a physical assault on school grounds and neither the administrators nor the police followed up.
These sorts of conversations are also difficult because my children are so different from one another. They both feel things deeply and have an enormous capacity for empathy, but one is demonstrative and will express frustration with the world while the other will quietly reflect. We have to ask our youngest if he has questions and more often than not, he doesn’t.
A few years ago, I discovered helpful information about talking with your kids about violence through the National Mass Violence Victimization Resource Center. I find it best aligns with our family’s approach. It encourages being proactive and truthful. If you and/or your child is struggling with the news, I hope you will find this resource helpful.